I am Whatever YOU say I am?

You’re a bitch. You’re mean. You’re kind. You’re smart. You’re stupid. You’re creative. You’re an ass. You’re so thoughtful. You’re so inconsiderate. You make me feel happy. You make me so angry. You make me feel stupid. You make me feel small. You make me feel threatened. You make me feel insignificant. You think you’re so smart. You think you’re all that. you You YOU!!! ME Me me.

I am exactly what you feel I am. I must be… you are so certain of your facts. If you are having a shit day and you need something I can’t give you, I’m a bitch.  If I seem confident and you’re struggling with your self esteem, I think I’m the freakin’ queen of the universe. If I’m dressed up and you’re dressed down I obviously think I’m better than you. If I speak up when you don’t, I’m pushy.

I can’t win. I can’t even fight. I don’t even know there IS a fight… I am just going along, today, tomorrow, every day. Just like you. I don’t know why you react like that. I don’t know how to NOT be what you think I am.

We talk a lot these days about bullying, about accountability. Is it possible (bear with me for a moment) that YOU, with whatever your life contains, are experiencing ME through your own filter? If I am obviously so superior, maybe it’s that you actually feel inferior and there is no way I can talk to you that will make that change?  If I am pushy, maybe you really are just noticing that you aren’t able to ask for what you need and I can? If I am dressed nicely and walk with confidence and you’re in your sweats feeling blue, does that really translate to me thinking I’m all that and a bag of chips?

If you are blue, you are blue. If you feel like shit, that’s you. If you are not ready to stand up in public and ask a question or voice a thought, that’s your reality. It doesn’t make you less. It doesn’t make me more. It doesn’t necessarily mean I’m bossy or mean or bitchy , either.

I am not responsible for who you are.  I will perceive you to be who I perceive you to be; doesn’t make my opinion the truth. Same for you. So how about if you stop a moment next time before you declare me to be something negative and make sure it’s really me you’re talking about.

 

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